Dedicated to you...
To the man that could make me smile, even when it seemed impossible. The man that everytime I saw gave me butterflies. And damn his contagious smile and laughter that could fill the room. We had our ups and downs, and it was painful. But our happy moments were worth it, they were all so bittersweet. To the man i fell truly in love with, and always will be in love with. I miss you and I miss us, and i've said it countless times. I tried to reassure you of our crazy love. Our crazy love where i felt on top of the world with you. I always look back at our photos and videos and smile, we were so happy and in love. What happened? I tried being there for you, i tried fixing us. But i guess it just wasn't good enough. If only you would be able to see things from my eyes. I did gain knowledge from us, one being to try to forgive. Two to, believe that your past mistakes shouldn't define who you are now and what you're trying to become, because everyone makes mistakes from time to time. Fighting/arguing with you is the most painful thing I have ever done in my life; it's so emotionally, physically, and mentally draining. Seeing you hurt and seeing myself hurt was painful enough. I just wish you would've acknowledged my efforts and would've let me prove you wrong; for you to open up to me like you did before. Maybe we could've fixed and mended each other wounds with love. But fear overcame... You'll always hold a special place in my heart. I hope i still have that special place in your heart too. No matter the heartache we went through. Even when you weren't wanting us, I still was. I'll always hope for us. I'll be here for you always. Maybe I just watch too many romantic movies and a sucker for love stories; where after all this we can still work out like in the movies...But now the silence we remain in is the most loudest you've ever spoken. And all I can do now is wish you the best.
This playlist is dedicated to him, and anyone struggling with love. You're not alone...you're not alone at all. I hope this touches you as it touched me. The main purpose of this was to express my emotions of falling in love and towards the end of the playlist the mood changes, as problems with the relationship arise; insecurities come into play. And as insecurities come into play, more and more issues came into play. From constant arguing, trust issues, lack of communication, to even the worlds advice. What people say to you about your relationship can be painful to hear. They're only looking out for you in the end, but it's up to you. You should do what you want, what your heart wants. I found myself pushing people away. The intro of "the loudest silence" the man and woman talking it's so powerful and he explains what love is, take a listen. This song always manages to move me, as I was in that mans shoes telling everyone how much I loved my significant other. In my story, they're both confused (who wouldn't?)But yet there's that person who still wants them because they believe their love can overcome; is going through this internal battle on what to do to keep this person around although they know in the back of their head, them mending their wounds is almost impossible. But still tries to fix it for them. But love isn't painful, it should never be. In the end, this was just a way for me to express my struggle and my feelings from my personal heartache, through music.
"Love is patient, love is kind. it does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. it always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. love never fails." 1 Corinthians 13: 4-8
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