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1. Goodbye

Goodbye

Instrumental By Saru Beatz HUGE THANK YOU TO SARU BEATZ FOR THE INSTRUMENTAL!!!!! When I was a little kid, I used to think the world was made for me Like, everything was just gonna work out. I’m sure everybody feels that way to some extent but, then, something happens, and you realize, that’s not how the world works it may seem crazy, but maybe your just a click away keystrokes and letters in comments to see if your okay a couple clicks on a picture, another puzzle piece, but nothings near as simple or clear as this shit appears to me When I first met her was high school, i was a sophomore, she freshmen, i had a girl then, who left when, she met a new kid i’m guessing but i’m not stressing, depressing, till I got out. i found a couple a friends who would help me let go of doubt and not that you were the closest, or oldest, i still suppose its important to mention, How I could never figure you out It never looked like you struggled, you acted so fucking brave I always looked your direction, whenever you make a change I probably should have read the lines written between the page and honestly i’ve been staring at all of them till this day you moved away still in highschool, to move back in with your father I knew that there had been problems, from watching you often wander I knew that I thought you awesome for moving the fuck away though then getting a decent job and then making a decent pay so you honestly made me jealous, with everything you’d create cause honestly i’ve been hating the way that i’ve stayed in place Somehow you seemed way more free than me, envying your escape The way I saw it, I didn’t think that you had made mistakes In fact I had kept on telling myself i should act that way I guess you were just a face that had helped me get through the day you’re not as tough as me, thinking that i’m the mockery of everything that i’ve ever built up and actually thought you’d be thinking that every thought of depression that I fought off was a lesson because I watched, you off fighting against the odds not only did you go beat em, you fucking made them retreat which gave me the inspiration to spit over all these beats turns out that what I had thought, was just a product made by me and probably doesn’t compare to anything that you’ve seen your wife came home to find bullets laying on the floor no note to say your goodbyes, her gun missing inside the drawer and I would also imagine an awful lot of remorse and probably also worry, and panic as well of course there are reasons to be deceitful but never to feel complete fully needles to say, of nothing, delete this whole shell away it’s ok if you’re feeling empty, you always can fill your cup there’s rarely ever a reason, to grab the knife and make cuts But i’m guessing that’s what you did as you rode off up on your bike The heavens can be your home now, i’m sorry is what you’d write up above where they’d find your body from searching for several nights it probably felt so aweful, to muster up most the might to stay where she cannot find you, to watch you move to the light i’m sure it will be a struggle, for her to still feel alright your apologies not enough dear, the damage you’ve done’s not right it’s honestly not enough to apologize for the life and so she took it, I guess she was feeling crooked it’s sad, and it’s sick to look at, it’s making me feel shook I’m closing the damn book, i’m thinking ok maybe, my prospects are still good or maybe it’s all fucked, like everything she’s seen and really i’ve been living, a stupid ass pipe dream no future to get money, no message that I mean and nothing for anybody, cause everythings obscene this really cannot be, I thought that you felt free it’s awful to actually ponder, the things that they might dream but probably its more likely to just be more lost sleep

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2. Books (Prod. Jaso_)

Books (Prod. Jaso_)

Produced by: The Jasom https://soundcloud.com/thejasom/chill-pill Lyrics by: Christopher Fontes-Barry Lyrics: Now she's ripping me apart, Tore the spine from the heart, but the art is still there, cause the words on the paper, aren't removed by the tear. Like the feelings that you share, don't ever seem to fade away, although they may not be as strong when there's some fragments of them gone. But the memories will help, if you read the chapters right. Though you tore some pages out, cause it helped you sleep at night. Now your sick of sleeping in, you cannot wait any longer for a chapter to begin. Then you finally find an author, get a couple pages done. But you'll never feel complete, because she's just writing for fun. A couple stories all at once, feeling like the roughest draft, as you tell her that your done, and slowly edit out your past, and continue on your search to find a new story that lasts. But the nature of the game is that most the time they don't. In fact its hard to find a person, who will read the things you wrote. You just keep on getting passed like a letter or a note. With the creases piling up, and a damper on your hope. It's like you're Icarus she's the sun. And you're just about ready to run

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3. GrabatIt (Produced by Salugi)

GrabatIt (Produced by Salugi)

Produced by Salugi: https://soundcloud.com/salugi Lyrics: I just wanna go home I just wanna go home I just wanna go home Yo, I, wanna go back But im never going there Like I musta gone black And everytime I try I always seem to refract Like my light hits your glass When your shouting kiss my ass, and, uh, I, know you never mean it This routines just to convenient, and I'm sure as hell to lenient, but im getting sick of fiending, for this love and what its meaning, I'm still toking so I'm greening, making mess rather then cleaning, I'm about to hit the ceiling, and I really only wanna go home I just wanna go home I just wanna go home I just wanna go home I can't stand being here anymore, I can't ignore, this constant knocking at my door, but still unsure, if I should open up, or keep it shut, like I do, but leave me be I'll probably get right back to you, asking you, how I do, if you could make me feel again, like a [10], or recommend, some other end, then again, I'd understand if you just want to go, home, but, don't take my flow, cause I can't be alone. With my phone and my lyrics, and no body else to hear it, thats the point, right, roll, joint, light, and enjoy as I try to go home, but I can't, and I don't understand why I keep coming back, with a rap on a track, like im tryna hit a point a little smaller than a tack, but the fact, of the matter, is im not yet at, where I wanna be, so I won't be, headed back, only forwards where I'll go, staying focused in my zone, until I finally write song, that makes me finally feel at home.

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4. Dreaming

Dreaming

Instrumental is Who Jah Bless No Man Curse/ Reggae Riddim/Instrumental by Fingerz/MusicClassRoom Link: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NxDTXXtcFSk Fingerz Channel: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCjfWyp2g6xFNHzBu3i2Nxow

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5. Really High Hills (Prod. Salugi)

Really High Hills (Prod. Salugi)

Produced by Salugi: https://soundcloud.com/salugi/really-high-hills Written by Christopher Fontes-Barry Lyrics: Yo, Salugi Sometimes, it's just worth starting over Even though you're growing older Certain roads will just get colder Shoulders feeling sore from straps Attached to bags up on your backs And close all torn to tattered rags So slowly turn and stagger back Through every word you wrote in raps And every eigth you burned from sacks because it helped you choose your track Back before when you could have fought For all this passion that you caught Spending eight hour shifts, in the home depot parking lot Recording over tracks with the mic on your laptop Not because you wanna be there, but there's nowhere else to go You had to free your mind, and could not do that at home So you had to find a place where you could finally be alone So you could finally feel creative, writing lyrics on your phone Metronome keeps clicking, as new memories come up You're tryna write a song, but only think of stupid stuff Like High School, writing poems to bitchy girls to spill your guts Who then share them with your peers, who point and laugh, and call you nuts Or a couple years before that, writing songs right after school Just scribbling notes on paper cause it made you feel cool Got some lyric's to go with it, about love, cause you're a fool Even then you thought you'd make it, cause your glass is always full full of nonsense some would say, cause you're using shotgun tactics Isn't that right Mr. Bray, but he taught you bout theatrics So in you're book he's ok, but it would have been fantastic If he'd given you that A, but he didn't know you cared or were writing every day, and will probably never stop Because you've always been that way, cause you've got to get it out But can't find the words to say, until you finally write them down and make the feelings go away

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6. Mine (Produced By Jason)

Mine (Produced By Jason)

It's dope, so enjoy it.

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8. Drive

Drive

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10. Anti - D (Prod. MeeloG)

Anti - D (Prod. MeeloG)

Produced by MeeloG. Intro is about a minute long... sorry

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13. Something

Something

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